My Girl - the one starring Dan Ackroyd, Jamie Lee Curtis and MaCauley Culkin - would hardly be considered a movie even worth mentioning in today's cinematic world.

but a poem from that movie created such an impact (not quite like the one The Power of One had on me, but you know what i mean...) that till this very day, i remember the exact moment of the movie i cried. really cried. let me share the poem with you.

Weeping willow, with your tears running down
Why do you always weep and frown?
Is it because he left you one day?
Is it because he could not stay?

He found shelter in your shade
You thought his laughter would never fade.

On your branches he would swing
Do you long for the happiness that day would bring?

Weeping willow, stop your tears
For there is something to calm your fears.
If you think death has ripped you forever apart
I know he'll always be in your heart.

not exactly a significant example of literary, but in the movie, this was to have been written by a 10-year-old, thereabouts...so i figure they had to make it credible like that.

for many years, i could only remember the first stanza of this poem. so as i searched the web for the poem in its entirety, i chanced upon a memorial page. this page was created by a couple, whose son passed away in 1992. he was born the same year as me. his name was John-Paul James McCann.

yet another sobering moment. he was born in 1981.

i read a blog this morning that would normally bring tears to my eyes. fortunately, i managed to read it without shedding any.

i find myself unable to care for someone the way i used to care for him. i mean...i still love him, and probably always will, but i simply can't bring myself to even initiate a hug right now. keywords would be right now.

he thinks i'm gonna leave him. well, i guess he has reason to believe that. but i'm not about to leave him. i've been trying to explain that even if i'm not around physically, i'd still be floating around somewhere. and should he ever need me, i'll fly to his side rightaway.

that's just the kinda friend i am. or rather, the kinda sister i am.

you see...no matter how much love you have in your heart, if someone pushes you away way too many times, you have to think about giving up at some point. i did...i gave up. then he rushes back to me like raging bull, expecting everything to return to normal. that...after i've mourned "losing" someone that close to me.

he's just a kid.

if you know me well enough, you'll know i don't like to treat kids as kids...i'd like to think that they're as capable as we are, only on a much smaller and simpler scale. so please stop trying to get me to see that he's only a kid. because i've never lost sight of that. i just thought he deserved more credit than i'd give a normal kid. because i thought he was special.

if you're reading this, you'll know that i'm not leaving you. just like i'm not leaving those who've been around for me all this while.

remember ohana from lilo and stitch? that'll forever be the sstt motto.

and i'm not leaving you.