today was the longest day of the week, yet it was the shortest i've ever spent at SIASR.

today was spent catching up with old friends, people who've been ever so concerned about me, as well as strengthening the new ties that've been forged over the past few weeks.

jeff asked if i was truly okay. i told him i wasn't, but i was working things out...also said not to worry, because pain is part of life...pain is evidence of living.

it was tiring rushing from one place to another today...and all the walking totally wore me out.

today played like a sequel to the 14th of February.

at least it masked the underlying pain...hid it so much that i couldn't quite recognize those feelings while i was with the gang today.

it certainly helped that sweetie kept that smile on his face.

he's got such a wonderful and warm smile...and because it's a rarity for him to smile on sundays, having him share his warmth with us is special enough.

but it also got me wondering if we were all in the same boat.

we might be battling different demons, but we might be going through the same fundamentals; we were trying to fight off these demons.

the eternal optimism and overflow of laughter when we get together is evidence of the kinda shit we'd love to keep within those closets.

even when we're crashing as individuals, we've vowed to be there to hold each other up. kinda brings me back to the time in camp new hope. we were staying on, refusing to let up because we loved each other too much...and we didn't want each other to suffer alone. i stayed on for my girls.

right now, i'd love to stay on for my babies for as long as i possibly can.

i'll stay on the road.

it's gonna be helluva ride but the journey is reward enough.

i hope to give and receive a great many hugs in the interim...

and today, i gave my first "hug-and-kiss" bundle since...well, since him.

it was a good day. and it's gonna be an even better saturday and a fantabulous sunday.

just you wait and see.